Life goes on here. Not much new or exciting, just life. I guess that is how it is supposed to be. The weather is starting to be warm on a more consistent basis. I have lots of pretty flowers growing and a few vegetables. I really do enjoy working in the yard.

I haven't heard much on my background check. I am going to call them this week and see what the status is. I faxed one document to them twice because they said they didn't get it the first time. I didn't hear back so I think they must have got the second one but I don't know for sure.

I got my botox shot but it is always a bit difficult to tell how effective it is going to be for a few weeks. There are many times when I regret ever having the surgery done but I guess that is really useless regret. I went to Page after the shot, spent the night there. Bill was in CA so I was there by myself. He had left a list of things he needed me to do or check out. I also picked up some things I didn't get when I left. I had breakfast with Charlene and Sheila the next morning. It was really nice to see them. I didn't think Charlene was ever going to quit hugging me. After breakfast I went to Hatch to help Janett out for a few days after her shoulder surgery. I stayed at her house all but the last night. I really enjoyed being there with her. Susan and the baby were also there. I spent time with Mom and Dad each day and one night they took us all out to dinner for our birthdays. When I left Dad hugged me and told me to be careful and that he missed me and was sorry he couldn't do more for me in my life. I told him he had loved me and that was all I needed. He had tears in his eyes. I had said goodbye to Mom the night before because I knew she wouldn't be up when I left. When I packed my little cooler for the road she had put a sweet roll in it along with a note that said "Give Lisa a hug for us." I am so blessed to have such good parents.

I just got back from a nice walk. I am having a hard time wanting to exercise like I know I need to but I am still managing to do it most days. I miss being able to walk around the golf course, see the road runners, bunnies and lizards. This morning I walked around some of the neighborhoods around here. This is an interesting area. There are lots of older homes but also lots of newer, modern homes. I love the older homes because most of them have a front porch. Reminds me of summer Sunday afternoons at Grandma Barneys. She had her chair, Grandpa had his chair and the rest of just just sat. I like that the house we are in now has a front porch. I have a really old chair my Mom refinished for me and I have put it on the front porch. Many mornings I eat my breakfast out there. The porch here really needs to be repainted and I am working, half-heartedly, on getting the old paint scraped off so I can paint it.

I like this area but I still feel pretty much out of place here. I thought maybe I would feel a bit at home in the LDS church here but, I don't. I feel almost like a stranger, an intruder here. Maybe its because I know nothing about anyone or anything. When I walk by a house I never nod hello or say good morning to someone I know. The only people that seem to even recognize me are the ladies at the DMV - LOL how sad is that?

I have scheduled a botox shot in Scottsdale on my birthday. I have been stressing about what to do because I knew I wouldn't have insurance before I needed one again and if I go to a Dr here I am pretty certain he will want to do all kinds of diagnostic tests before he will give me a shot. I might be able to scrape up enough for a shot ($1200) but I would never be able to pay for the tests. Not sure why it took me so long to realize I could just go back to Scottsdale one more time. Hopefully by the time I need the next one I will have insurance. The move here hasn't helped my voice as much as I had hoped it would. I would really like to try out some speech therapy.

We have been here just over a month though at times it seems much longer. We are all slowly adjusting to each other and our new surroundings.

I have dug up a bunch of places to plant flowers and have planted some vegetables. Just this morning I noticed I had radishes coming up. I can't believe how many weeds and how much grass I have put into the green recycle bin. I am also about ready to hang my hammock in the back yard.

Some days I enjoy all this free time and other days I am really, really, really, ready to go back to work. I think I must be struggling a bit with depression. I don't know what else would cause me to feel so tired and worn out all the time. I try not to nap during the day - which is a huge change for me, I love naps - because I want to be able to sleep well at night without taking ambien. It also might make a difference if I didn't go to bed at 8:00 every night.

I had an interview with the background investigation unit last week. I think they have finally started on my background check in ernest. I worry about my voice more than I do the background check. Once I can get some insurance I am going to look into speech therapy. I can talk to Murphy and the birds, and most times Lisa, just fine but if it is anyone else my whole throat seems to freeze up and I have a hard time getting the words out.

We went to Jamie and Jareds baptism last Saturday. I guess this is one occasion where my obliviousness worked to my benefit. People weren't overly friendly to me but no one was overtly rude either. Lisa said she noticed some disapproving looks and I guess there was talk afterwards about how brazen Lisa was to bring *her* (me) to the baptism. I guess I didn't think I would ever hear myself being referred to in those terms but - it is what it is and if people choose to dislike me that is their right. If Jamie and Jared had asked me to stay away I would have but they didn't and it was their day so I went.

We have been to the Ward here a couple of times and to a Universalist Unitarian Church once. The UU church was different but I liked it, it was very peaceful and uplifting. We will probably go back there again this Sunday. People at both places have been very welcoming. The missionaries have been over a couple of times. This last time they almost insisted that we give them a date when we would come to church and stay for the whole 3 hour block. We finally got through to them that that just wasn't going to happen. If we wanted to do that it would be on our own timeline. They didn't make an appointment to come back again which is probably just as well.

I have been working in the yard most of the day. I am tired, sweaty, have already broken my new shovel and uncovered a rock that is too big to move alone so I decided to take a break and write a bit.

I am pretty amazed at how at peace and comfortable I am here. I really do like this area. The population is just over 14,000 and the elevation is 469 feet. A bit different climate than I am used to but I am loving the nice weather. When we went to Walmart yesterday I realized that it is probably time to start planting a garden so I have been working on the garden spot today. I enjoy yard work much more than I do housework.

We have been to the beach a couple of times. The weather has been just beautiful both times we went. Yesterday it was mid-70's, not a cloud in the sky and very few people. I really hated to leave. I am thinking I might be making a few trips to the beach on my motorcycle before I start work.

I talk to Bill at least once a week and email him a weekly update as to what I am doing. I know he doesn't hear well on the phone and it is much easier for both of us if I can write and he can read. He never responds to them but tells me he enjoys them. He always sounds good when we talk.

Not long after we got here we went to the wedding of a couple of Lisas lady friends. It included a dinner and we were set at the same table as a very nice couple, Vicki and Helen. Vicki is from Monroe, UT, not awfully far from Hatch. They seem like really nice people. We are going to meet them at the beach for dinner in a couple of weeks. Helen is a nurse so she might be able to help Lisa out some along the way. I'm hoping for a good friendship to develop.

It's been a rainy, overcast and I haven't accomplished much of anything. I kinda gave my permission to just take the day off. Lis and I did go for a good walk today, we walked to the grocery store and got stuff to make hummus with. Even though it is rainy and overcast it is still 60 degrees outside. Lisa is working tonite and I am just sitting here listening to the Tennessee Lady Vols basketball game on the computer. The house is so quiet. I am sitting in the living room, I am trying to get out of the habit of basically living in my bedroom. I have moved my laptop out and leave it in the living room rather than the bedroom. I remember when I was a kid my mom used to say if I had a bathroom and food in my bedroom I would probably never come out. I was feeling a need for some comfort food tonite so Murphy and I shared a package of mutton.

I got a job offer from LA County, Santa Clarita station, this week. I accepted the offer. They still have to do a background check on me and it will probably take about 3 months to complete. That is pretty standard I think. I kinda wanted to work at Simi Valley, and I will still test with them tomorrow, but I have trusted the process with this move so far and I will continue to do so. I worry alot about my voice holding out. I know I need to take this time to really work with it, read out loud, meditate every day. When I did my oral interviews my voice was so good. When I talk to just Murphy it is so good. Makes me crazy trying to figure it out. I hope this last botox shot will last until I can get some insurance. I might ought to put a $1000 aside just in case it doesn't.

I found a place to fix my motorcycle. They came and picked it up yesterday. The initial quote was almost $600 but when he looked at it it was just the radiator overflow tank instead of the actual radiater that was damaged so it should be quite a bit less. I told him to tune it up for this altitude while he had it.

We are in our house and have most of the stuff put away. We stored a lot of it in the garage because there just wasn't room for it all in the house. It is a nice house, it is older and has been re-done. The outside and the yard need a bit of work but I don't mind doing stuff like that. We are in Fillmore. It is an agricultural area. We have a lemon tree and an avocado tree in our back yard. I love being able to make fresh lemonade. There are numerous fruit and produce stands just a few miles down the road from us. The weather has been amazingly warm. I have been in shorts and bare feet and we sleep with the windows open at night.

We got the truck loaded and unloaded OK. The only mishap was unloading my motorcycle. It high centered on the truck before coming down the ramp and I think I tore the bottom out of my radiator tank. I tore the bottom out of some tank. I hope I can get it fixed in the next couple of weeks. This is perfect motorcycle weather

My animals seem to be adjusting well. Sammy has plucked some feathers but I have seen him with less. He seems to want to spend more time with me than he did before. It has been a long time since he wanted to come sit with me. I am really proud of Murphy. He has been such a good cat. I love that boy, he always brings me comfort.

I interviewed at 2 different locations for LA County Sheriffs office. Both places talked like I would be among the top candidates. I also went to an open house for applicants at Simi Valley. That is where I would really like to work. It will probably be 3 months before they make a decision though. If I am out of work for that long I will be stir crazy.

I think it is more of an adustment for us to make a life together than either of us thought it would be. I think probably about 5 days is the most we have ever spent together at a time. I get homesick, I always have ever since I was a kid. Sometimes I long for something familiar. It's hard to realize that my family is now almost 10 hours away instead of just over 2. I sometimes wonder if I am just not spouse or partner material. Maybe I am only good as a friend. I will probably end up being some crazy old lady with a houseful of birds and cats and will make news of the weird and strange on the internet.

I have most of my things that can be packed packed. Some of it will just have to be loaded. I will pick the truck up in a couple of hours and get a few hours packing in this afternoon. I hope to get enough done that Lisa and I will be able to finish it after we get in from Phoenix on Saturday, that way we can head out early on Sunday. Unload the truck and load up her apartment on Monday.

I think this is still a bit surreal to me. I went for a walk around the golf course this morning, watch the sun on the vermillion cliffs, looked at the canyon carved by the Colorado River. I love this area. I don't think I am able to get my mind around the fact that this morning is the last time I will be able to see those things for awhile.

We had kind of a scare with my Mom this last week. She went into the hospital with a rapid heart rate. They couldn't get it stablilzed so they had to put her our and shock her heart to get it back into rhythm. She went to see the heart Dr yesterday and he said she is OK but if this happens again they will have to take her in and do something with the electrical impulses to her heart. I worry so much about her and not being able to be close by if she needs me. I'm glad Janett, Barb and Lewis are all right there.

A couple of days ago I got a call from another dispatch center in LA County for a job interview. I have one in La Crescenta on Jan 15 and one in Santa Clarita the next day. The next week I am testing for a Corrections Officer position with Ventura County. I have some good possibilities lined up now I will just pray that something will come through.